Yesterday was an interesting day as you can probably tell from the title of my post.
A few months ago a woman called at the door wanting to conduct a survey, she said i’d get a voucher for my time so I said ‘yeah why not’. I couldn’t do it there and then, I probably had something important to do like eat pizza, so she handed me a leaflet about it. It was about fucking contraception! As a gay woman, contraception isn’t exactly my strong point! So yesterday was the ‘survey interview’. I was asked everything from which form of contraception i use right through to how many times i’ve had anal sex. Luckily I could just give the letter of the option I was choosing which is a good job otherwise Sarah’s laughing would have given it away. I decided that my ‘character’ was Lola, she uses a condom and the withdrawal method of contraception, she has only had 2 sexual partners but has lots of oral sex and has experimented with a woman. Ha ha! I was also asked to give a urine sample for them to test. I explained to the woman that I had gone before she arrived and didn’t need it but she really wasn’t going anywhere without my piss! She kept saying ‘Just give it a few minutes’ and even offered to come back in 10 minutes, I honestly thought she was going to sit with me in the toilet until i managed some!
The stupidity of this person is definitely worth naming and shaming or just ‘picturing’. This was the clever dick that thought opening the window on the bus whilst it was pissing down was a good idea. I was lucky enough to be sat behind him getting it all in the face, thank you.